reflect 2012

What a year 2012 has been. What. A. Year.

Perhaps the biggest lesson this year was really that of shaking me up in terms of my identity (or lack of) in Christ. Moving out of home and into school was more than I'd thought. It wasn't just the act of moving out, but also discovering who I really was once taken away from my ultimate comfort zone.

Living on my own meant that I had to learn how to handle, above all things material, time — independently. I learnt then that I am all too prone to allowing my fleshly desires get the better of what I need to place as priority. Why? Simply because I have failed to allow my character to be stronger than my competency, i.e. My being in Christ is not stronger than my doing. Which led to poor decisions and tough lessons.

So much has really happened. The pictures do not cover all the milestones, but I guess I'll just go with milestone by month.

In January, I moved into campus. Semester 2 of MPrep year. I got to know a lot of schoolmates better and made some really close friends. Played even more ball and hung out even more with the seniors/graduating batch. I received free lessons from listening in to their theological discussions, and suddenly I had many big brothers, the kind I'd always wanted. I was invited to tag along on their grad trip to Vietnam... February, I began counselling sessions and got to know myself much better. March was Easter Convention and I presented a solo to the biggest crowd I'd ever sang to. Bombed, but humbled.

April, I received healing in the most unlikely manner/person and I thank God for it. Suddenly, it was May and it was graduation time. And Vietnam time. One of the best trips ever. 2nd in line to UK, I had my first Scuba diving experience that left me breathless and praising God. This is my Father's world indeed. June, we saw off many seniors who flew back to their hometowns... I practiced hard for my Grade 8 voice exam, and July — was exam time. School restarted, new class, new batchmates... Was elected onto the 18th Student Council, heading Student Services & Estate committee.

August, I received my exam results: Distinction. Praise God :) Had a super Youth Coaches'/leaders' planning retreat too. September, I made an agreement with God at the EP pastors'/leaders' retreat and 2 out of 3 details were fulfilled and ironically sparked off a need for closure rather than desire. My first long-term initiative for the school, The Free&Flea, was officially opened. Back up sang at the F1 and got to see some of the race. Also sang backing vocals for Inch's upcoming album.

October, closure came. Final projects were submitted and November after exams, I preached my first "main service" sermon in P's church. Ran YF programmes for December, and then there was a wonderful Youth Camp. And also a good reinstatement of friendship.

I'm pretty sure I missed out on a lot of details but I guess this is also for my own referencing, and more importantly thanksgiving to note how God has shown me so much grace and favour in my coming and going. The Jehovah Jireh truly knows what I need. :)

2013 is going to be crazy. A different church to serve in for a year, speaking engagements agreed upon way too early, GDC in Philippines in May, Thai MT in June, GPC camp soon after, a new syllabus but one thing's for sure: 

His faithfulness and mercy and grace and love... I have learnt so much, and I know He will carry me through. I have only one aim for the year — to remain in Him.

(I guess if you flip through my blog archives for the year you'd get a semblance of what I learnt exactly heh.)

Zoning out,

b.